Bird-watching

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Some people invest in binoculars for the express purpose of observing bird-life. They take great delight in identifying species by their feathers and their bird-call. It’s not hard, when you think about it, to understand why these enthusiasts are so captivated by the world of birds. Birds are rather enigmatic in a way. Many species don’t even store food, their nests are temporary and purposeful, and who knows where they go when they fly away, or what their daily routine is?

Birds visit my garden often. The parrots come to eat the lilly-pilly’s that hang over my back fence, and the insanely noisy red-tailed galah’s absolutely adore splicing off branches from my numerous cape lilac trees in early summer. I adore the swallows, too that sometimes visit our industrial-town beach. To me, they all seem like winged nomads, little visitors who appear, full of chatter, then vanish. They seem to have a bird-culture we humans know nothing about. I hear them ‘talk’ to each other and I wish I knew what they are saying. It’s startling to think how eerily silent the world would be without their melodic songs (although to be honest crow and galah songs sound more like a cacophony than a melody). Nonetheless, bird calls, to me, are like the singing bowls often used in meditation. I think they help raise our vibration, or our mood. They say to us; “Wake up!”

Like natures punctuation marks, birds connect our attention to both the heavens, and the earth. It’s no small wonder that angels are depicted as having wings also. They too, inhabit the air but are closely linked with life on earth. Some say that when you find a white feather it is a sign that your guardian angels are watching over you. A black feather is thought to indicate that a deceased loved one is nearby and sending a message of love. Why wouldn’t spiritual beings send messages in such a tangible form like a feather? It’s the perfect metaphor.

A beautiful quote from Meister Eckhart serves as something to ponder, as we allow ourselves become curious about the birds we see around us everyday:

“Every living creature is full of God and a book about God”.

So next time you notice a feather on the ground, pick it up. Allow it to connect you with the unseen realms and the present moment in the material world. Let the birds of the air share both their wisdom and wonderful attributes. All we need to do is listen to their story.

Off With the Fairies-A Walking Meditation

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Take a walk, if you will, among the trees. For there are times when a walk in the forest is much more than just a simple walk in the forest.

Take the walk slowly. Set your intention to be as awake and aware as possible. Because of this, or perhaps just because of a moment of grace, you may notice the shifts in the air. The breeze, the wind has it’s own voice, it’s own ebb and flow. It goes where it will and you feel it on your face, and through your clothes. Perhaps it is speaking to you.

The paperbark trees that line the path also have a voice, something to say. They are like quiet sentinels, gentle guardians…maybe a little protective; if they could speak aloud they might say; “Tread gently here”.

You keep walking, deciding to take a different path than usual, hoping to see things with new eyes (how wonderful is it to have new eyes!) Yes, a fresh perspective is what you need right now…you think: “Something may pop out into the forefront of my awareness, because I’m fully focused on being present right now!” Nature is truly a Gracious giver. You can come as you are, and she always offers all that she is, reflecting your reality but also revealing something more. An earthy groundedness.

So you come across an interesting tree, so gnarly with termite mounds, yet it is still standing. And it seems pretty content. You think it’s a good idea to stop there and just kind of stand looking at it as if to absorb what it has to communicate. Later on you will reflect on this particular gum tree, how it stood flanking he path, and how it somehow reached out to you. How you, and the tree, and God even, are all one. How loving compassion must be even more real and tangible than a nature walk. You realise the tree, in all it’s diseased state was offering a beautiful earthbound solidarity toward the experiences you are travelling through. The world is but a mirror. As as above, so below. The Divine is not untouched by suffering or illness, it would seem, according to the wise old tree.

You decide it’s time to turn back now, travelling along the same path you came. You notice that beside the trees are shadowy pockets of low foliage. It doesn’t matter that you can’t identify the bushy plants and ground covers, but they are like mini forest walks, mini worlds, with their own pathways and clearings. A hidden subculture of nature undisturbed by human hands. It’s really quite magical, like a fairytale.

IMG-1745 (2)There’s so much beauty and mystery in our world. We walk beside a multitude of spirit companions, each with a different task and possessing a unique aspect of the Source of all life. May you have moments of grace where you can sense all that is around you, every good thing that is supporting you and quietly offering peace and consolation. May you learn to stop for a while and look at the trees.

Creating Space for your Inner Child

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The other night I had a visit from a lovely friend (social distancing, of course. We sat outside in my studio, drinking pink gin, painting and chatting). My friend has an amazing 10 year old son, Elijah, who has autism. He is incredibly creative and gifted artistically. She describes how he can just sit and watch bugs or nature in general for hours. He draws all the time- anything and everything that captures his attention. They are in exquisite detail and in a unique style that he has already developed. Whatever he does is with wholehearted interest, whether it be science fiction or fossils. It’s like the world is teeming with fascinating treasures waiting to be discovered. Because of this, our busy and noisy world is often overwhelming for him, causing him to shut down and not be able to contain his feelings or reactions. He is a person who sees things in way that is full of intense curiosity and joy.

Our conversation caused me to think about what it means to be really present in the here and now. It’s a state of being we all long for, I think, because most of us, even after difficult childhoods, have memories of being there- lost in awe and wonder, lost in the present moment. Times where, like Elijah, we reached that wonderful ‘flow’ state during our playtime. We were un-selfconscious, completely unaware of ourselves and how we were being perceived by others. We were absorbed to the point where the outcome of our play, whether it be a cubby house, tower of blocks, mud cakes or car tracks, was completely irrelevant; so focused were we on the present moment. Our imaginations were untethered. Magic and other realms existed, stories were not just tales, but four dimensional worlds. We would forget to eat, and have that sinking feeling of disappointment when it was time to leave or go inside. Eckhart Tolle describes this state as an inner spaciousness, where we are truly alive or awake, living from our ‘larger self’ which is connected with God or Source.

It must be said, to have a wounded inner child, or a childhood robbed completely is a deep tragedy that requires all the more courage and self-compassion to be able to embrace the present moment. But I want to focus on another aspect here. During this time of isolation, it’s easy to see how cluttered our lives, and consequently or minds, have become. As I said in a previous blog post, I have taken up the practise of Contemplative Prayer. It is a simple practise where the instructions are to take a comfortable seat, be still and silent thereby ‘consenting to God’s action and presence within’. When engaged with thoughts (or feelings or sensations), gently bring your awareness back with a sacred word of choice. The prescribed time is 20 minutes. I’m a novice at this. However, not only have I become excruciatingly aware of how much my thoughts repeat like a mouse on a wheel; but I have also noticed how seldom I really am present in the moment.

My son and I had a little chat about what he discovered on YouTube about dopamine. As a society, We have (unsurprisingly) become addicted to high levels of dopamine due to our fast-paced culture. The things that cause a rush in dopamine uptake are the things we do that offer instant gratification. This particular YouTube channel suggested a ‘dopamine detox’ day- days where you basically do nothing. You simplify, maybe read a book or write in a journal, but really make the effort to slow down the mind and activities. It reminds me of the Sabbath day in Christian and Jewish traditions where everybody rested from their labour one day a week. For many, the C-19 pandemic has been a forced Sabbath. An opportunity to reset and simplify.

Life truly is in the Now. The more we set our intentions to slow down, quiet out minds and ‘be’ rather than ‘do’ the more we can become aware of the presence of God (or Source) in our lives. I’m telling myself this all the time, because I have found it to be very slow progress! But whether we are consciously aware of it or not, we all are amazingly connected both to each other and to Spirit. There is a universal heartbeat in everything. The “I am” of God is reflected in all that is around us and also within us. We see practical demonstrations of this connectivity all the time- when you have been thinking about your mother and she calls you; when the dog becomes restless just before a family member arrives home. When you walk in the forest and sense the energy of the air, the insects, birds and trees.

It’s my sincere hope, that whatever circumstances you find yourself in at this time, your life will unfold into something deeper and more free. We are a collective in an energetic sense, yet at the same time are are all on our unique journey. Nobody knows your own life as well as you do. But I also want to offer hope and comfort in the sense that you and I are held and not alone in a universe that is both loving and benevolent. May you discover the treasures of awareness that your own inner child knows and remembers well. Like Elijah, make friends with curiosities that come across your path, no matter how commonplace they may seem to your adult mind. It is my prayer that we all find space for that joyful little kid that lives inside of us all to lead us on wondrous trails and unknown destinations.

Contemplative Silence

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Lately, I have committed myself to a practise of contemplative prayer.  This is essentially a practise of silence, of stilling the mind – or not so much stilling the mind but observing the crazy meanderings it follows without judgement. In a way it is as a response to the isolation we are all experiencing due to the COVID 19 pandemic; but also I have known for a while that I need to slow down and simplify.

I want to share a little piece of my heart, what I have been learning in recent weeks, and my hope and prayer is that there will be someone that migt resonate or feel encouraged too.

Lately, maybe due to this practise of silence, I have become so aware of my chattering mind, my ego. Sometimes I feel so captured by its endless judgements and circular, repetitive, anxious thoughts. It’s overwhelming.  But I am positive, because I have also had glimpses of something more. It may just be seconds of clarity, but they are precious nonetheless. During these moments, I sense myself as a child, a being tenderly held by her creator and life. My very breath is not my own, I cannot control the ebb and flow of life found in sounds of traffic, my dog barking at some imaginary intruder, the cacophony of birds, the interruptions of others in my house moving about their day. I become aware of the only task at hand, to surrender to my God, and the only thing necessary is to show up, to maybe till the soil of my mind so it is malleable and God does the rest. God plants the seed and causes the seed to grow.

The idea of surrender is to be attentive to what is, in the moment without assigning inferences, my own empty manipulations and labels. Just as each moment is fleeting, so too is my awareness of God- fleeting. All I can do is come to each moment with open hands, not expecting anything, just letting things be as they are. In the silences and the stillness, there is the voice of God, a whisper, a moment.

I am frustrated and I wish I could be more silent, more surrendered to the moment. But, maybe I need also to have compassion for the ‘little me’, my ego. For I know it must die, become smaller. It is a fragment of me, but not the real me who is eternal and hidden in the eternal present in love and with love, with God.

Tired

Published on by Alyssa KanitschLeave a comment

I’ve been so tired for many months, I’m sure many of you can relate…it seems a struggle to just get through the day doing normal things. After a blood test showing low iron I became hopeful that my energy levels were just due to that. Two iron infusions later, no energy joy 😢

I wanted to share because I know so many of us suffer with things that we can’t quite put our finger on. Auto-immune issues, depression and anxiety are very real. I have so many things I want to do, even have the resources (I’m so fortunate here), but lack the energy to bring them to fruition.

Please know that if you can identify in any way with these feelings, you are not alone. Sometimes it can feel like all your good intentions come to nothing. It’s a bit like feeling paralysed despite wanting to move towards better mental and physical health.

I have no words of advice, just my own journey. I have found that teeny tiny baby steps have saved me. It’s so hard to take the pressure off and rest when I need to. But I need to, and so do we all! Today was good. I had about 3 hours of productive art time and I’m so glad for that. I’m trying to lean in to simple things…meditation, yoga. Yoga is especially great if you have muscles that are often achy.

We don’t have to be great, excellent, amazing or anything else in this life. It is enough to know that you, and I, we are loved. We are loved. We are totally and unconditionally loved.